Bubba and Billy Bob were just goofin' round...

...with guns and badges.

Taking aim at Lee Zurik's photograph

"There was never any ill-will or threat intended by it."  St. Bernard Parish Sheriff Jack Stephens.

There was never any ill will?  Does he understand what that fucking means?  There was never a threat?  If I put up a picture of Jack Stephens with a bullet through his forehead on this blog I am more than positive that I would get a visit from the FBI in short order.

Yet, it's alright for Stephens' backwards-ass deputies to take it even further by putting actual bullets through Zurik's picture at a public venue?

If these guys are allowed to keep their jobs it's a fucking disgrace to the citizens of St. Bernard.

But on the positive side I just landed a whole new Sneaky Snake category for part II.

Stay classy St. Bernard deputies, there will be a special place in the snake pit for you as soon as I find out exactly what your names are.

NOTE:  I would never put up a picture of anyone with a bullet through their head.  That was a hypothetical analogy for anyone who can't grasp such cerebral constructs.  I suspect Billy Bob and Bubba are in that category.  

Portrait of the Shoplifter as a Middle-aged Man

I just wanted to share some of my artwork with you guys.  This was inspired by an event which took place last week.  I'd like to thank a local politician for the inspiration.

Do you think I did a nice job on the cover up?  I know he did.

Fo' true or not fo' true?  Weighing the evidence.  

Sneaky Snakes of 2012, Part 1

After a two year hiatus, I decided this year was a good time to create yet another Sneaky Snake Countdown.  I can’t decide if it’s a 2011 (retrospective) countdown or a 2012 (prospectus) countdown.  So I’m just calling it Sneaky Snakes of 2012.  Well...actually...there’s one other caveat....this time I’m going to use reptiles in general, not just snakes.  Some of these folks aren’t really “snakes”, they just have reptilian tendencies so I’ve decided to expand my anthropomorphic palette.  

Oh...and some of them are imaginary reptiles who may not actually be reptiles.  

Oh...and I’m using some overarching themes this time with smatterings of new factoids buried here and there.    

Actually it’s not really even a countdown....and...ah hell...you know what?  Just enjoy it.

The Original Snake Pit:  River Birch

Fred Heebe, I believe, is a sorcerer.  He reminds of me of Kaa, the snake in the Jungle Book.  He must have some hypnotic talents capable of seducing...practically everyone....into his pit.  His pit being the River Birch landfill.

 

River Birch has shaped up to be the mother of all corruption stories in the N.O. metro area.  Everyone, I mean fucking everyone, seems to have been on Heebe’s payroll...except for me and that’s probably just because he never offered.  I have yet to fall under the King Cobra's spell and, of course, Doug over at Slabbed. SOP (his screen name) has been covering the River Birch machinations like stink on...a landfill.  (See...I am tempering my profanity.)  While most MSM resources have been curiously soporific on the matter (perhaps victims of Heebe’s bewitchment), Slabbed and crew have been relentless.  Perhaps reckless as well but this blogging thing can get ugly, present party included.  It’s like watching the raw camera angles and outtakes on a porn shoot as opposed to the final edited flick...you don't want to see that...trust me.    

Regardless, this guy, Heebe, makes even King Georges envious with his mystical charm and such.  

His prowess is so great, we’re going to lead off the Sneaky Snake countdown with King Cobra Fred Heebe and devote an entire theme to it.

Landfill Reptiles

For those of you who aren’t familiar with the entire River Birch saga, here’s a quick, inadequate synopsis:  Freed Heebe and his stepfather, own the lease to the River Birch Landfill out near Avondale.  They don’t own the land itself...another dude owns that.  In an effort to increase their business, Heebe and Ward ALLEGEDLY paid off a fuckwad of power brokers, from politicians to jack-ass “journalists” (present party excluded..not from being a jack-ass but from getting paid), to direct more trash into his cache by either discrediting the legality of other landfills such as the Old Gentilly Landfill or by outright buying lawmakers’ votes and influence.  They supposedly accomplished this feat in every cash conduit path imaginable but namely “campaign conduit” methods to...hell...just about every politician in Orleans and Jeff Parish.

Of course I’m exaggerating...but not so much.  

Now...enter the Rat Snake, Henry Mouton.  

Mouton, a Lafayette native, served as the Louisiana Fisheries and Wildlife Commissioner circa 2006ish, 7ish.  After the FBI grabbed him by the tail, he immediately turned belly up and admitted to accepting a nest full of eggs from “Dude A” and “Dude B” in the FBI investigation in order to bear his venomless fangs against any competing landfills to River Birch.  One TP report originally stated Mouton took $464k from the River Birch nest but a report just published puts the total at $267,490.  Regardless, Henry the rat snake, rolled like a gator with a deer in its jaws.  Word on the street is that he not only used his position to influence contracts for River Birch, he may have even served as a Heebe comesee.  

The word, underground, where reptiles and snakes dwell, is that Mouton told the Fed that three prominent New Orleans politicians took outright bribes in regard to the River Birch landfill.

ahhemmm....non-sequitur?

The Blue-Tongued Skink, Ann Duplessis.

From the Wiki (with liberal editing):  

Skinks look roughly like true lizards, but most species have no pronounced neck and their legs are relatively small; in fact several genera (e.g., Typhlosaurus) have no limbs at all.  Most species of skinks have long, tapering tails that they can shed if a predator grabs the tail. Such species generally can regenerate the lost part of a tail, though imperfectly.  Many species are good burrowers.  Skinks can have green blood due to a buildup of waste products.

Former Louisiana State Senator, Ann Duplessis, is currently serving in Mayor Mitch Landrieu’s administration as the Deputy Chief Administrative Officer.  Duplessis’ ability to shed her tail after it's been snagged and her uncanny ability to burrow in a spot, defying extraction attempts, prompted me to label her the Blue-Tongued Skink.  Why the blue tongue?  I don’t know...it just looks better.  

Notice Duplessis didn’t make it to the snake category...yet.  And another one who hasn’t made it to that category....

The Komodo Dragon:  Cynthia Willard Lewis

From the Wiki:  

As a result of their size, these lizards dominate the ecosystems in which they live.  Komodo dragons are cannibalistic and eat their young.  Their unusual size has been attributed to island gigantism, since there are no other carnivorous animals to fill the niche on the islands where they live.  Komodo dragons eat by tearing large chunks of flesh and swallowing them whole while holding the carcass down with their forelegs. For smaller prey up to the size of a goat, their loosely articulated jaws, flexible skull, and expandable stomach allow it to swallow its prey whole.  After digestion, the Komodo dragon regurgitates a mass of horns, hair, and teeth known as the gastric pellet, which is covered in malodorous mucus. After regurgitating the gastric pellet, it rubs its face in the dirt or on bushes to get rid of the mucus, suggesting that it, like humans, does not relish the scent of its own excretions.  Occasionally they consume humans and human corpses, digging up bodies from shallow graves.  Saliva samples were analyzed by researchers at the University of Texas who found 57 different strains of bacteria growing in the mouths of three wild Komodo dragons.   If cornered, they will react aggressively by gaping their mouth, hissing, and swinging their tail. If they are disturbed further, they may start an attack and bite.  Even seemingly docile dragons may become aggressive unpredictably, especially when the animal's territory is invaded by someone unfamiliar.

The Komodo Dragon is certainly a curios animal from the Far East.  While dominating its habitat, it doesn’t always serve the best interest of its own kind.  In fact, it can be cannibalistic.  If challenged, it will open its mouth and hiss loudly.  I’ll leave it at that.

The Pit Viper:  Derrick Shepherd

Oh bloody hell...I don’t need to say anything about the bad shepherd.  Just look at the picture and laugh.  

Back from non-sequitur?  What is a non-non-sequitur?  There’s no such thing as a sequitur, you know?

Anyway, this leads us to the most surprising landfill reptile find of 2011...

The Frill-necked Lizard:  Garlandfill Robinette:

Note the silver tongue

 Wiki:

The frill-necked lizard is ectothermic and maintains its homeostatic body temperature by basking for up to 40 minutes.[citation needed] This achieves an average of 2–3 degrees Celsius above the surrounding temperature. Weather conditions, including sunlight, are the main factors regulating the lizards’ temperature.This basking period usually occurs in the morning to early afternoon.  When the lizard is frightened, it gapes its mouth, exposing a bright pink or yellow lining; the frill flares out as well, displaying bright orange and red scales.  The emblem of the Australian Army's Regional Force Surveillance Unit, Norforce (North West Mobile Force) is the frill-necked lizard. The lizard was selected as the unit's emblem because of its speed, aggression, and ability to blend in with its surroundings.

Not only is the Frill-necked Lizard a master of camouflage...you really can’t tell where it’s coming from.  It routinely basks in its own magnificence around the noon hours of the day.  While loving “sunlight”, its colorful frill tends to block the view of its own ass.  Sometimes, it doesn’t even know where it’s standing.  But who cares...what beautiful frill it has.  Frill on Mr. lizard.

WWL commentator, Garland Robinette....the “Voice of Katrina”....took a quarter of a million smackeroos from the King Cobra himself.  He claimed the money was “a loan” and had something to do with paying off a bad real estate investment regarding some property on the other side of the pond.  

According to Garland, it wasn’t a payoff to promote the River Birch landfill, dis Heebe’s competitors (which he did), or simply not talk about the whirlwind of controversy surrounding River Birch on his radio show....it was just a simple loan ‘tween two good bro’s.  

I suppose Heebe could have been moving from the trash business into banking...I buy that...I think that’s a totally logical progression, coming or going.  Only problem with that explanation was that they didn’t really put any of it on paper.  Hmmm, for his sake I hope the King Cobra runs the landfill better than he lends money.

Oh look....his banker status just got worse.  I really want to get a loan from First Heebe and Trust.  

And.....

“In another new disclosure, Robinette, an avid painter who used at least part of the $250,000 from Heebe to build a 400-square-foot art studio, was paid $10,000 by Heebe to paint portraits of Heebe's twin daughters. Ciolino declined to discuss the portraits.”

I’d just like to point out that I was the first peckerhead to ask that question.
 

Of course, whatever Heebe or Ciolino want to do with their money is their business.  As for Robinette, while he may be a “public figure” with a very large responsibility to the community to inform and....well....tell the fucking truth,  he is not a government employee nor is he responsible for public money and contracts.  Regardless of what the money was for, no laws were broken as far as I can tell.  Maybe a tax issue, perhaps, but that can be remedied without criminal proceedings.  

See, Mouton must go to jail for his quarter of a million dollar payoff because he was a public official.  

Garland....he’s just a radio host...a public figure but not a public official.

Just a radio host....that we all trusted....who was constantly preaching about transparency and “the perception of corruption”....and integrity...journalistic integrity.  

Garlandfill is the same guy who during the Cedric Richmond/Joseph Cao campaign ranted (paraphrase), “You can’t trust these blogs, it’s not real journalism!”  OK, G...we’ll take your word for it since you had such a firm grasp of the story and a superior sense of journalistic integrity.   

I can no longer bear to listen to his midday, basking period and that’s really a shame because I used to enjoy listening to him.  Of a radio station full of aging, half-informed, ultra-conservative, white guys, he was about the only one I could listen to without vomiting.  Now, I feel queasy every time I accidentally run across his voice on my radio.  

He’s like Dennis Miller, there was time when he was really entertaining and pertinent, now you just cringe when you hear his voice.  You can only assume he got desperate and fell under reptilian influence.  Will your legacy be a George Carlin legacy?  Or a Dennis Miller legacy?  

Garlandfill’s legacy is now of the Dennis Miller variety....he’s become the joke.

Her-ass-ic Snark

It seems just about every sneaky reptile in this year’s post can be linked to River Birch and our old buddy Aaron Broussard is no exception.  Unfortunately for Broussard, former sneaky snake, Tim Whitmer, molted his skin and coughed up a big load of dirty on AB.  To add insult to injury, Broussard’s former squeeze, Karen Parker, has done the same after Broussard landed her a 6 figure job with Jeff Parish as a paralegal even though she had not the resume to perform the task.  

Love seems to be fickle in the underground, reptillian world of Louisiana public corruption and Parker is no exception, shedding her own skin while shoving it up Aaron’s wazoo.  She’s certainly made the top of the candidate list for “Housewives of Jefferson Parish” or whatever repugnant television series Bravo can dream up for our region.


Broussard and JP is not AZ’s area of expertise so I merrily refer inquiring minds over to the Slabbed nation.  Doug and crew have launched such a crowd sourced, scorched earth, expose into the Broussard, River Birch, JP reptile den they have even pissed off the Canadians.  I didn’t know that was possible.  The mounted Canadian internet police have gone so far as to force Doug’s website host to shut down the blog.  He’s back up and running now but I’m quite sure the pressure is still on Slabbed and crew.  I’m quite sure of it because they’re on the heels of some very big players who will use any means necessary to avoid exposure.  Some of these players have been referenced on AZ in previous posts...sometimes they’ve been referenced in the same post.  I’ll let you figure it out.

Oh...also...let’s not forget King Cobra Heebe’s influence over Broussard...AAANNNNDDD....Heebe’s influence may have even extended to our own former chrome-domed leader, Ray Nagin.  Bet that one caught you off guard...keep your eyes open for that.  

Anyway, I’m going to give Broussard and crew the dinosaur award this year.  I chose that reptile format because I truly think the “Aaron Broussards” of the Louisiana political environment are a dying breed and well on their way to extinction. 

Alright, I may have gone overboard with this pic but if you do a Google search for dinosaurs and you find this, you've gotta use it.

Even though Broussard is fighting it to the bitter end...he's toast. For corrupt, old school, LA politicians, the intertubes has become the destructive equivalent of the asteroid strike which slammed into the Yucatan peninsula and wiped out the majority of Jurassic denizens.  Oversized T Rex’s like Broussard simply can’t exist in today’s relentless scrutiny empowered by online citizen media.  While the phenomenon has yet to spread to other areas of the state, I think it’s just a matter of time before the asteroid plume darkens the skies of Baton Rouge and suffocates other bloated reptiles in the gret stet.

As a matter of fact...Baton Rouge sneaky snakes....you should check in with crazy ass Bob Breck about your immediate forecast.  I think it’s time to plan your evacuation route.  I know you guys think you’re immune to chaos but I have reason to believe the tempest is upon you.  I think US Attny. for the middle region of LA, Don Cazayoux, is about to play Tonto to Letten’s Lone Ranger shtick.  

In case I haven’t mentioned this yet...I’ve been conducting preliminary research on a documentary project I hope to start shooting in short order.  The theme will deal with lessons learned from AZ and I hope to have it finished by this time next year ( cough...cough).  

Snakes on a Plane

While conducting the autopsy on exactly what happened during the nightmare that is now known as the “Nagin years”, it has become apparent to me that the infamous plane trip on the HSOA/Fireline G4 jet was a critical moment in the corruption schemes of the day.  The main players all converged on the jet:  Aaron Bennett, Frank Fradella, Ray Nagin, Greg Meffert.  Decisions were made such as putting Anthony “Bowling Pin” Jones in as a puppet CTO and the Chicago jet trip is where Bennett first connected Nagin with Fradella and raised the possibility of kicking back the lucrative Home Depot contract to Ray and son’s company, Stone Age.

Actually, the decision to put Bowling Pin in as CTO was made on the 2nd half of the G4 jet tour when they left Chicago and flew to Vegas.  Turns out then current CTO, Mark Kurt,  was hanging out at the Chicago House of Blues when the G4 entourage arrived to join in on the fun sans Ed Burns (Ciber) who was footing the bill for the Chicago leg of the tour.  When Kurt saw Meffert waltz into the club with Aaron Bennett, he lost his shit with the Meff, called him a few choice words and announced that he was officially quitting his CTO position.  Turns out Kurt was ultra-paranoid that Bennett was simply bad news and could threaten their own criminal enterprise.  So off he went to work for Burns and Ciber while Ray and Greg were left to decide who would fill the CTO spot on the trip to Vegas.

Everyone likes to talk about the muthafukin’ boat....but the pimp-ass plane was just as much a vital part of the overall story.

What’s interesting is that most folks think the Bennett timeline and the Meffert timeline were completely separate stories.  True that Bennett was never charged for his machinations within Orleans...he was officially stung over his Plaquemines shenanigans.  But what you may not know is that Meff and Bennett were cohorts from the beginning of Mayor Nagin’s tenure.  In fact, Aaron was partying down with the crew on the Silicon Bayou and may have even taken on Jimmy Goodson’s pimp role once or twice in keeping the boat stocked with the finest T & A New Orleans had to offer. 

Bennett, of course, pleaded guilty to bribery charges after former Plaquemines Parish Sheriff, Jiff Hingle, wore a wire for Mr. Fed and recorded him agreeing to provide said crooked cop with a payoff.  This was just a small turd in comparison to the multiple steaming piles of poo Aaron dropped around the N.O. metro area while racking up one parish and federal contract after another.  Particularly the lucrative multi-million dollar Army Corps. of Engineers contract he obtained by claiming his disabled veteran father was the actual owner of his company, Benetech.

Benetech was recently stripped of its contractor’s license and after cooperating with Mr.Fed, Bennett will most likely receive a mere slap on the wrist in comparison to say....Mark St. Pierre’s 17 year sentence (more on this in part 2).  

But the felony charge hasn’t seemed to slow Bennett down much, the TP reported that Aaron recently siphoned 600k out of one of his companies in charge of the critical ACE contract.   I’ve also heard word on the zombie wire that Aaron is tunneling his way back into the contracting business, perhaps through his new wife, but officially keeping his name off the SOS database.  You can’t keep a good crook down.

Hell, he’s even offering up man on the street interviews to Fox 8.

Crazy huh?  Wait...it gets much crazier....

Someone under the screen name “merussell” has been posting some saucy pix of Bennett on Nola.com.  Aaron, that crazy bastard, is enjoying the limelight and spoils of being a quasi-rich, paludal contractor in the Gret Stet while simultaneously awaiting the judge to print his itinerary to Club Fed.  I’m told the pix of him attending the Playboy golf tournament and pix of him at the Playboy club (just look at them, you can figure out which ones) were snapped the day his lawyer pleaded guilty to his bribery charges with Hingle.  Hands down, my favorite pic has to be this one:

It really is quite amazing isn't it?  I’m not sure who merussell is but that is the name of his current wife in the pictures, Martha Russell.  I’m having a hard time believing Martha would post those pix on a public website while her hubby is awaiting sentencing for ripping off the public.  I’m sure the judge and the sub-contractors who have been...forgive me...stiffed...are just giddy knowing Aaron is out living the life on the cash he snookered off the public dime.
Remind me to tell guys about an idea I have for a "Pop-up" book.  

For the sake of argument, if it is her that is publishing the pix....I’d like to deliver a message directly to her:

Martha...this is not a game.  Your dickwad husband just embezzled 600k in cash from a FEDERAL contract and redirected it into a business and account with your name on it.  Do you know that means?  That means you are now on the hook with him...it means you’re fucked and I don’t mean on a beach, in a boat, or at the Playboy mansion...I mean you are figuratively, metaphorically fucked.  Let me try Star Wars metaphor on you with a Jedi mind trick, “You do not want death sticks, you want to go home and rethink your life.”  

And while we’re on the subject of the Army Corps of Engineers contracts Bennett received (and subsequently fucked up like he has most everything else in his contracting career), I have been researching a little story which I’d like to share with you in hopes that some fellow zombies can help me crowd source the information I’m looking for.  

I have very good reason to believe that Aaron Bennett bribed at least one high ranking official within ACE in order to...

1. receive MATOC contracting status 

2. get the multiple contracts Benetech received from ACE

MATOC status is not only difficult to obtain, it’s practically impossible yet Benetech managed to land it without having a fraction of the track record they needed to even be considered.  I have been in contact with folks who were involved in the inner workings of Benetech’s machinations and job performance on their ACE contracts and I am quite sure the Bennett wheels of incompetence were set in motion by payoffs to at least one high ranking official in ACE if not multiple people.  

Investigative reporters...start your engines.  This is a huge story.  This is a huge issue.  I’ve been told the work Benetech has done on these ACE contracts is subpar, shoddy and should never have passed the muster but for some reason the ACE officer overseeing their work consistently allowed them to pass with subpar work and continually miss deadlines.  This is a big deal folks....we’re talking about our flood control systems...you know...the same shit that failed during Katrina.        

Let me repeat...this is huge.  This may be the best chance we have of exposing corruption within ACE.  Help me...please.

Now...let me axt you a pacific question...if you wanted to pay off people for government contracts and favors without the payments going on the books, how would you do it?

Well...let me provide you with a scenario.  You write a check to cash from your company for...say...50k.  You take the cash, go down to Harrah’s or another casino and you buy 50k in casino chips.  You go to the roulette or blackjack table and gamble 1k or 2k then you get up and walk out the door with the chips.  You then go distribute those chips to the folks you want to pay off.  Those folks then come back into the casino multiple times and slowly cash the chips in being careful not to cash too much at a time and tip off the IRS.  

Pretty good plan, huh?  I wonder how long Casinos archive their video monitors.  

Just a thunk...anyhoo...

Now I’m going to toot my own horn for a second but I promise not to post any naked pix of myself in leather underwear with Playboy bunnies.  Mainly because those pix don’t exist and I’ve never had the pleasure of meeting a Playboy bunny.  

Reptiles from a Galaxy Far, Far Away

I have always maintained that Fradella and Bennett were the key to busting Ray Nagin.  As you all know that seems to be exactly how it is playing out.  I was the first media resource to make the connection between HSOA’s subsidiary Cornerstone Marble and Granite and Nagin's Stone Age.  I was the one putting my ass on the line questioning former city attorney, Bob Ellis, about his wife, Daya Naef’s involvement with Fradella and Bennett’s companies and whether or not it constituted a conflict of interest, especially considering the city had lawsuits against those companies.  The original opinion at the time from LSU law professor, Greg Smith, was that everything was just kosher.  I didn’t digest Mr. Smith’s assessment very well and I have continued to examine Mr. Ellis’s dealings with Fradella and Bennett and other issues.  I never let up and I have uncovered numerous reasons for concern.  

Apparently Mr. Fed didn’t swallow Mr. Smith’s original assessment either and now Ellis is officially under investigation.

When Ellis and Naef originally came to Rising Tide III to “confront their accuser” they weren’t alone.  Bob had two “friends” with him...very large dudes that were scanning the crowd during Harry Shearer’s keynote.  I seriously doubt Bob’s assertion that he was there to identify me and serve me with a libel suit. 

I think he was there to intimidate me into shutting the fuck up.

I didn’t.  

In fact I met with Bob and Daya in my lawyer’s office to try and reach a resolution on his grievances against me.  I refused to take down anything I had posted on them because I did not believe I had libeled them.

I believed I was asking very important questions that affected our city in a very difficult period.  

The resolution we agreed on was to allow both of them to post letters to AZ readers to explain their side of the story, which was exactly what I was requesting from the beginning.  Those letters of explanation are posted here and here.

In retrospect, I would point out these items in Mr Ellis’s response:        

2. I never have drafted, reviewed, or participated in the award of any bids.

I do not believe this is true and have talked to 2 separate sources who claim that RFP’s were personally delivered to Bennett by Ellis before the bidding process began and they discussed how the bids could best be obtained by Bennett.  It’s also worth noting that Benetech’s bonding company for the LAI job, Infinity Surety, was not a T-listed bonding company.  This is a basic requirement for any federal/state/city contract.  Someone within the city attorney’s office had to allow the Benetech contract to pass without the company being backed by a T-listed bonding company.

5. There is no such thing as a “no bid” contract.

Well we know that’s not true after the St. Pierre trial.  In fact, Benetech obtained the interim city IT services contract without a bid as I had originally claimed.

12. There are no conflicts of interest between Daya and myself. In the one case
where her client had litigation against the City, it was resolved before the City
need to respond or appear; the matter was never assigned to me.

We now know that Bennett paid Ellis $35,000 for a “market survey” of the Plaquemines Parish jail project through one of Ellis’s companies, Opus Consulting.  Maybe there were no conflicts of interest between the two of them, Bob and Daya, but there was certainly a conflict of interest between the “private businessman/attorney Bob Ellis” and the “city attorney Bob Ellis”.

If you read the blog regularly you know there is a deep well of questions that have arisen on Ellis’s many companies and his dealings in City Hall.  When he came to the Rising Tide event, he was wearing a shirt with a picture of Yoda on it.  I assume that was in response to my “Only a Sith speaks in absolutes” post.  As you know a Sith is very clever at hiding their true nature and to that end I am now calling Mr. Ellis “Dark Yoda”.  

Yoda is a reptile, huh?  Oh well...he is now.

Our next Star Wars reptile comes to us from Plaquemines Parish....Jiffa the Hutt

I try to stay on track with AZ and stick to Orleans Parish reptiles but Louisiana corruption is so damn incestuous (and that’s coming from a native Kentuckian) you can’t possibly isloate the story of one parish’s criminals without crossing over to another.  

While River Birch and Fred Heebe’s dealings cross over into multiple parishes and affect a whole slew of public figures, Bennett’s tentacles are rather impressive as well.  For all of his dealings in Orleans with Nagin and crew, it’s funny that Mr. Fed decided to nail him via former Plaquemines Parish Sheriff, Jiff Hingle.  

Jiff made the mistake of crossing FOX 8 investigative reporter Lee Zurik’s radar and sweet Buddha....if you’re a crooked politician the last thing you want to see on your caller ID is that name.  If you do see it, just go home, pack up your shit and head for Costa Rica...Bora Bora...Bunkie...wherever.  

Hingle pleaded guilty to falsely reporting 150k in campaign contributions and taking 20k in a bribe from Bennett.  But the list....oh man....the list on Hingle is long and sordid as the LA. State legislative auditor recently echoed.  The enormity of Hingle’s footprint...or assprint in the case of Jiffa the Hutt...may have even snared a former FBI agent.

Zurik is a one man wrecking crew when it comes to public corruption in the metro area and he even did the unthinkable by crossing the pond and drilling into the St. Tammany corruption snakepit.  You see...Tamminites believe everything in St. Tammany is far removed from the perceived cesspool they view Orleans to be.  Everything on that side of the water is “safe”...even the corruption within their parish government is insular and untouchable for the most part.  

Well, Zurik didn’t get the memo and he nailed former Tammany assessor Patricia Core to the fucking wall in what may have been the most uncomfortable interview in local television news history.  

I mean it’s like watching sausage being made....from puppies.  

Zurik questioned, among other things, why her office was using public money to buy meals and alcohol at incredibly expensive restaurants.  She blamed everything on her boozing employee, George Klumpp...after telling Zurik she “deserved” to buy expensive meals on the public dime.   

Core is now...of course....the subject of a federal investigation.   Henceforth, Patricia shall be known as Admiral Klumpp-at-the-Bar (Admrial Ackbar for you non-Star Wars fans or non-Ole MIss grads).       

Look...I want to help local public officials, corrupt and legit.  I’m serious about this....if you get a call from Lee Zurik and you have something to hide....just fucking run...run as hard and far as you can.  Or if you’re Catholic just have him meet you down at the confessional and hope the public finds it in their hearts to forgive.  Whatever you do...don’t taunt him...that’s a really bad idea.  


I break....Part II coming....