Wednesday, August 03, 2011

Pill popper? That's the best you could do?

Ya know....

Contractor Aaron Bennett's actions and his contacts in government warrant a probe: An editorial

....I really just want to sit back and watch this thing unfold like a Grisham novel.  I got no skin in this.  But then the petrified, little dicksmacks just can't stop lashing out on their way down.

Zombietracke?  Dude signs into NOLA for the first time, nearly 2 years ago, under this story:

'American Zombie' blogger outs himself while facing libel suit from City Hall employee

Guy named himself after me?  I'm flattered.  I'm also flattered that he's taken the time to read my Facebook page (apparently incessantly) and discovered that I am indeed "popping pills".

I don't have a lot to hide, so I don't mind anyone knowing that I'm taking medication.  I posted it on my FB page because I was amused at the side effects of the drug, Neurontin.  I said it was like eating a pot brownie stuffed with Viagra....and that is a very accurate description.  My doc said it is a "wonderful drug" with few side effects.  She forgot to mention that the side effects are wonderful too.  I would highly recommend you ask your Dr. for the prescription.

I expect to get a new sponsor in short order.

So anyway, cyber-stalking dude...I'm pretty sure you're reading this...and I'm pretty sure who you are.  You gotta do better than that, man.  Pill popper?  I mean shit, brah....I've got a long and sordid chemical history but I've never been ashamed to throw that out there on this blog.  Did you think that was going to discredit me?  

Pills?  Try DMT....really....I mean you should try it.  I think it would help you a lot.  But I'm not a doctor...a shaman, maybe....but not a doctor.

I've masturbated before.  So now we got that out in the open.  One night when I was drunk I ate 7 cupcakes.  I know all the words to "Mr. Blue Sky" and I sing it at the top of my lungs when it comes on the radio in my truck.  Sometimes I like the smell of my own farts...that's pretty fucked up but it's true.

I've even broken the law...more than once.

But I've never committed a felony.  I've never betrayed the public trust by using my position for personal and financial gain at the expense of public contracts and public money.  That's pretty shitty in my book, man.  Especially in a city that has over a 50% high school drop out rate.

Stealing from that...fucking a city in that condition...that's lower than Jabba the Hutt's balls.



Editor B said...

Dude, do you know where I can score some DMT?

Jason Brad Berry said...

I don't at the moment but it usually presents itself if you look for it.

I just read somewhere that LSU is actually producing it and studying it's effects. You could volunteer for that program.

I've done it once...which was enough. Definitely a life changing experience. I wouldn't recommend it to just anyone but definitely to you.